If you missed my last post, my son, who is special needs, left the house on his own for the first time. This was a terrifying experience for our family. Take a look at the post to catch up:
We are far from alone. It is said that about half of all autistic kids will elope at some point in time (elope meaning take off, not getting married). Extra scary was the fact that we are up the hill from a lake that would have taken two minutes for my son to walk to and about a ten second walk from the road.
Now that the dust has settled, breathing has recommenced. That, and the ever present push to plan ahead. Because when you are living the special needs life, you need to try to envision what’s coming next. You need to be several steps ahead, if at all possible. Hypervigilance is an exhausting but necessary state of mind.
I knew that it was important for me to remember that this has happened before for other families. Why reinvent the wheel when I can investigate what other families have done to prevent this scary occurence from happening again? So, off to the internet to search for solutions I went.
I found this wonderful article that absolutely refuses to let me give you a link to it. So here is the URL: https://veryspecialtales.com/prevent-autistic-child-wandering/ If you highlight it, copy it and paste it into your search bar, you’ll get there. Don’t miss this incredible resource!
I am so grateful for this article. Thirty ideas to take, make your own and apply to your unique situation! I wasn’t sure where to start, so this gave me a place to begin.
After discussing it with my husband, we both agreed that number 29 spoke to us. It states, “If possible, identify elopement reasons and try to address them.” We know why he went out. He wanted to jump on the trampoline, which he loves. In fact, he spent the rest of the evening after the escape trying to drag me out the door to go back to it. It is hard to bake with a child attached to your leg and yanking on you! We know that until we get the money to fence in the whole play area, he can’t go out there by himself (I miss having a completely enclosed backyard!). So we have decided to do the next best thing. We are going to buy a trampoline and put it in the house.
We have only 1600 square feet. Last year we decided to downsize when we moved to the country and it is much easier to take care of our new home than our former 2700 square feet. This is going to be tight. But choosing between bringing in what he wants from the outside or dealing with elopement and endless fussiness, for us, is a no brainer. And we are not buying one of those minis with the handles. Five feet and up to 220 pounds with a net around the top and bottom is the way to go for us.
By removing the reason why he left the house, we are hopeful that we won’t have to deal with this again for a long time. But we know that eventually, we WILL have to deal with it again. Every time you think you have things under control, the game changes.
In addition to the trampoline we also had a family meeting. We discussed the procedure for locking all of the locks each and every time we go in or out. We added extra locks that my son can’t yet manipulate. But eventually, he will figure it out. He’s really smart. I’m also still thinking about the service dog on the list. I am hesitant because I have been changing diapers for almost nine years so more poop management is not appealing. But, maybe we’ll do it anyway.
And… I’m breathing again. For now.