I was receiving a daily report from my son’s school that told me next to nothing. It had the same revolving 3-6 phrases on it. These included Needs More Diapers, Needs More Wipes, Cried Today, Refused to Work Today and Had Accident Today. And, usually circled at the top, Good Choices.
My son, Kai, is six years old and special needs. He is low functioning and mostly non-verbal. When he gets off the bus at the end of the day, I get a smile and a kiss. We walk into the house, he takes off his shoes and socks, I help him take off his jacket and he goes straight for his tablet. This is our routine every single day. He might signal that he wants cookies or milk by taking my hand and tugging it until I follow him to where these things are kept. Then, I might ask him, “Kai, do you want cookies?” And he might say, “Yeah.” If he is feeling particularly verbal, I might say, “What does Kai need?” and he might say, “kies.” And this is a fairly new accomplishment for us in terms of conversation. So I am left wondering when he comes home; what happened for the last eight hours?
The report left us completely in the dark. If he refused to work, what did he do instead? What work was presented that he refused to do? Was it appropriate? Is there something we could be doing at home to help in this regard? Did he seem tired? If I ask Kai these questions I might get a smile or a kiss. Or he may position my hands so that when he pushes on one I will clap. No answers there.
I could have asked them to create a different daily report but then they still would have been guessing at what information I wanted to see at the end of each day. So I decided to make my own daily report. On my Facebook page I periodically post an update about Kai’s achievements that I call The Kai Report. I decided to name it that. I made it pretty and left plenty of room in the margins for the teacher to add whatever notes she wished. Here is what the report looks like:
My husband and I had a meeting this past Monday with the Principal/Instructional Specialist at Kai’s school (usually this would be two people but we live in the country and the school is small). I brought her a copy of the daily report I usually get and the new one that I made so she could see the difference. She loved what I made and said it was absolutely no problem to use it. I started receiving it in his backpack the very same day.
If you want to receive different information on the daily report you receive, TELL SOMEONE. It is OK to ask for this. A lot of parents are intimidated when it comes to making requests but there is no way for the teacher or school to know what you need unless you ASK FOR IT. If you feel capable of making a pretty report, go right ahead. Not your thing? Make a list of what you want to know about. Be sure to give it to them in writing or e-mail it to them. They will work it out, I promise.
It’s been two days since I started receiving the report I created. Today when Kai came home from school I found out that he was stacking pool noodle pieces and was missing the yogurt that wasn’t in his lunch box (we ran out). I also know that he sat on the potty for three minutes and produced nothing. And that he was working on 1 to 1 correspondence in math. Suddenly, the eight hours he was away from home are not big blanks of time for me. And that makes me feel happier, more informed and more content that what is happening during his day is appropriate for him. I know this because I have it in writing.
What have you done that was out of your comfort zone yet gave you a really good result? Please share in the comments below.