As education in our country shifts and changes over time, teachers are constantly being introduced to new concepts. They then hand these concepts to their students. And the students, our children, bring them home to us.
Which is what my 9 year-old neurotypical daughter did the other day, when she brought up, “The Power of Yet.”
This concept is not new to me, but it is new to hear it from my child. And the fact that it is obviously being used in the classroom means that her generation is experiencing a level of emotional support as they learn that was sorely lacking when we went to school.
As education, however you feel about it politically, has evolved in the last 10 years, the buzz words have shifted to having a “growth mindset.” Having a growth mindset means believing that learning and intelligence is something that can advance and change over time. It can be developed. And it has a focus on self-improvement.
So when my daughter talks about the power of YET, it means that she may not be able to do something, YET. It leaves the door open to the possibility and even the probability that she WILL be able to do it in the future.
And, this, very powerfully, takes the place of, “I can’t do this.”
In the special needs community, the power of YET is even greater. Look at how these statements change with the simple addition of the word YET:
- My daughter is 7 years old and isn’t potty trained… YET.
- My son has cerebral palsy and can’t walk… YET.
- My brother is developmentally delayed and can’t write… YET.
It is also powerful for caregivers. Check out how these statements change:
- I am not finished mourning… YET.
- The meltdown is not over… YET.
- I have not gotten the rest that I need to function… YET.
- I have not gotten to self care today… YET.
Look, we know that living the special needs life might mean that some of these things will never happen like we originally envisioned. But that doesn’t mean they won’t happen at all. Or happen later than first envisioned.
For me, there is great power in using YET. My son is not potty trained YET. But recently, at the age of 7, he showed signs of beginning to understand the process. We are wildly excited about this. My son doesn’t verbally communicate consistently YET. But sometimes he will say things that are wildly funny and very appropriate to what is happening around him. My son doesn’t eat all solid foods, YET. But he choked every single day at every single meal for a year to the point of needing intervention so if he could outgrow that, he can get to solids. He just hasn’t. YET.
It seems like a small thing to use this word, YET. But sometimes in our whirlwind of caregiving, small changes are all we feel capable of. And this is a powerful one.
You may have not tried this, YET. I’m leaving the door open for you.